How to Write a Parenting Plan in Ontario: What to Include

When parents separate, the hardest questions are often practical ones. Who has the children on Tuesday? Who decides about school? What happens at Christmas, or if one of you wants to move? A parenting plan is a written answer to those questions, agreed in advance so that you are not arguing about them in the moment.

This article walks through what a good plan usually covers, how the Divorce Act treats a plan that parents submit, and what to do if you cannot agree. It is general information for Ontario families, not advice on your situation.

What a parenting plan is and why it helps

A parenting plan is a written agreement between parents about how they will raise their children after separation. It can set out when each parent spends time with the children. Most plans go further and cover decisions, holidays, communication and travel.

Writing things down matters. Verbal arrangements tend to drift, and each parent may remember them differently. A plan gives you both a clear reference point, and it gives the children predictability. Keep in mind that an informal plan can be difficult to enforce.

The Divorce Act applies to married spouses only. If you were never married, other Ontario laws apply to your parenting arrangements, but the practical content of a good plan is much the same. A lawyer can confirm which law governs your situation.

What to include in your plan

There is no single required format. The checklist below covers the topics most separating parents want to address. Use what fits your family and leave out what does not.

• A regular weekly or biweekly schedule, including school days, weekends and exchange times and places
• Holidays, birthdays, school breaks and summer vacation
• Who makes major decisions about education, health care, religion and activities
• How you will share information with each other and how the children can reach the other parent
• Travel inside and outside Canada, including passport and consent arrangements
• What happens if either parent plans to move
• How you will handle disagreements and changes to the plan
• Which child-related costs each parent will cover and how you will share them

Be specific where it counts. A line such as "reasonable time on weekends" invites conflict, while "alternate weekends from Friday after school until Sunday at 6 p.m." is easy to follow.

Schedules and decision-making

The Divorce Act lets a court allocate parenting time by a schedule. That is a helpful model for your own plan: set out the regular rhythm first, then add exceptions for holidays and special occasions.

The Act also lets decision-making responsibility be allocated in whole or in part. In plain terms, one parent might make all major decisions, or you might divide them, for example one parent handling health decisions and the other education. Some parents decide major matters together. Choose what suits your children and how well you communicate.

Travel, moves and changes over time

Travel and moves are where plans most often fail, so address them directly. Under the Divorce Act, a person with parenting time or decision-making responsibility who intends to relocate must give notice at least 60 days before the expected date of the move. Your plan can build on that by setting out how you will share details such as the new address and a proposed revised schedule.

Children grow and families change. Consider adding a review point, such as when a child starts school or high school, so that the schedule can be updated by agreement rather than by dispute.

From plan to court order

If you are dealing with parenting under the Divorce Act and the parties submit a parenting plan, the court shall include it in the parenting order unless it is not in the child's best interests. That makes an order based on your plan a stronger tool than an informal arrangement alone.

The Divorce Act also says that parties shall, to the extent appropriate, try to resolve the matters that may be the subject of an order through a family dispute resolution process. That can include mediation. In collaborative family law, both parties and their lawyers agree not to go to court, and if no agreement is reached you can still go to court but will need to hire a different lawyer.

What to do next

• Each of you should write down your ideal schedule, holiday split and decision-making approach before you meet.
• Start with the areas where you already agree, then work through the harder ones.
• Consider mediation or another dispute resolution process if talks stall.
• Have a lawyer review the draft before you sign, especially if it will become part of an order or agreement.
• If you need a court, the Superior Court of Justice hears parenting time and decision-making, and the Family Court Branch is located in 25 locations, including Barrie, Lindsay and Peterborough.
• If you are unsure where to start your case, a family case usually starts where you or your spouse lives, and parenting matters may instead start where the children live.

Frequently asked questions