What to Do First When You and Your Spouse Separate in Nova Scotia

Separating is stressful, and the first few weeks often feel like a blur of decisions. You do not have to solve everything at once. A short, calm list of priorities will help you avoid mistakes you cannot easily undo.

This article walks through the first steps in Nova Scotia: safety, children, money and accounts, documents, the date of separation, and what to avoid. It explains how things generally work. Your own situation may differ, so a lawyer can confirm what applies to you.

This article covers the law of Nova Scotia.

Start with safety

If you or your children are at risk, safety comes before every other step. If you are in immediate danger, contact emergency services right away. Nova Scotia also has emergency protection orders under the Domestic Violence Intervention Act, which must be applied for by telephone. A victim may apply between 9:00 am and 9:00 pm, while peace officers, Victim Services staff and designated transition house staff may apply at any time.

Family violence also matters later. When a court makes parenting decisions under the Divorce Act, it considers family violence and its impact, along with any relevant civil or criminal proceedings or orders.

Pin down your date of separation

A court may grant a divorce on the sole ground that the marriage has broken down. The usual way to show that is that you have lived separate and apart for at least one year before the divorce proceeding is decided. There are exceptions: breakdown can be shown sooner if the other spouse committed adultery or treated you with physical or mental cruelty that makes living together intolerable.

Spouses are treated as living separate and apart for any period when they lived apart and either of them intended to live separate and apart, so one spouse's intention is enough. If you try to reconcile, the year is not interrupted just because you lived together again for no more than 90 days in total, where the main purpose was reconciliation.

Write down the date you separated and a few facts that support it, such as when one of you moved out or told the other the relationship was over. If you are still under the same roof, how that affects your date depends on the facts, so ask a lawyer.

Children, money and documents

Keep children's routines as steady as you can, and avoid putting them in the middle of the conflict. When a court makes a parenting or contact order under the Divorce Act, it considers only the best interests of the child, giving primary consideration to the child's physical, emotional and psychological safety, security and well-being. It also considers each spouse's willingness to support the child's relationship with the other. If a court application involving children is filed in the Family Division, the Parent Information Program is mandatory.

Child support is generally based on the payor's income and the table for the province where the payor ordinarily lives. Do not guess at an amount. Collect the income records you will need.

• Your last three years of income tax returns and notices of assessment, for both spouses if you can
• Recent pay stubs and any benefit statements
• Bank, credit card, line of credit and investment account statements
• Mortgage, lease and property documents
• Pension, RRSP and insurance statements
• Your marriage certificate and children's birth certificates
• Notes on who has cared for the children and how, day to day
• Any messages or emails that show the date of separation or any safety concerns

Income is generally measured starting from the T1 General total income line, and a court may look at income over the last three years. That is why those tax records matter.

What not to do

• Do not sign anything you do not fully understand, including a separation agreement drafted by the other side.
• Do not empty joint accounts or hide money or assets. It tends to damage trust and can hurt you later.
• Do not cut off the children's time with the other parent without a safety reason or advice.
• Do not agree with your spouse to stage or misstate facts for a divorce; a court must be satisfied there has been no collusion.
• Do not post about the separation online or rely on blaming. In spousal support, fault (misconduct) is not considered.

Changing your name or taking other formal steps can usually wait. If you plan to change your last name, ask the government office about consent rules first, as a spouse's consent may be needed for a married person.

What to do next

Divorces in Nova Scotia are heard in the Supreme Court of Nova Scotia (Family Division), which also hears parenting arrangements, child support and division of matrimonial assets and debts. If you and your spouse agree on everything, a joint application for divorce may be possible, and the file can go to a judge without a hearing.

Cost is a real concern. Nova Scotia Legal Aid covers family matters under the Parenting and Support Act and the Divorce Act, among others, if you are financially eligible. Even a single meeting with a lawyer early on can help you understand your options before you make decisions.

• Make sure you and your children are safe
• Record your separation date
• Gather your financial documents
• Keep communication calm and in writing
• Get legal advice before signing or filing anything

Frequently asked questions