Parenting Time and Decision-Making Responsibility in Ontario

When parents separate or divorce, one of the first questions that comes up is: who will the children live with, and who gets to make decisions about their lives? If those words feel uncomfortable, you are not alone — and you may have noticed that Ontario family law no longer uses the words "custody" or "access" in most situations. Understanding the current language and framework can help you have better conversations with your co-parent, your lawyer, and the court.

This article explains parenting time ontario rules, the newer concept of decision-making responsibility, and how parenting plans work in practice. The law discussed here comes primarily from the federal Divorce Act (for married couples) and Ontario's Children's Law Reform Act (for unmarried parents or non-divorce proceedings). Both statutes were updated in 2021 to modernize parenting language and put children's wellbeing front and centre.

The Language Shift: Out With "Custody," In With Clearer Terms

For decades, family courts used the words "custody" (who the child lives with and who decides) and "access" (the other parent's time with the child). Critics argued this language framed children as property and encouraged winners-and-losers thinking.

The amended Divorce Act and Children's Law Reform Act now use two distinct concepts:

• Parenting time — the time a child spends with each parent, regardless of where the child primarily lives.
• Decision-making responsibility — the authority to make significant choices about a child's education, health care, religion, and extracurricular activities.

These two things are separate. A parent can have substantial parenting time without holding final decision-making authority, or the two parents can share decision-making equally while the child lives primarily with one of them.

What Is Decision-Making Responsibility?

Decision-making responsibility covers major life decisions, not everyday choices. When a child is with one parent during their parenting time, that parent can make routine day-to-day decisions — what the child eats for dinner, when they go to bed. Decision-making responsibility is about the bigger picture:

• Which school the child attends
• Medical and dental treatment choices
• Religious upbringing
• Significant extracurricular activities or travel

Decision-making can be sole (one parent decides), joint (both parents must agree), or divided (each parent holds authority over specific areas — for example, one parent handles education, the other health). Courts and parents can get creative, as long as the arrangement serves the child.

Joint decision-making works best when parents can communicate respectfully. Courts are cautious about ordering joint decision-making between parents who have entrenched conflict, because forcing communication in high-conflict situations rarely benefits children.

Parenting Time in Practice

Parenting time is simply the schedule — when the child is with each parent. Arrangements vary enormously:

• Primary residence with one parent, with the other parent having regular scheduled time (evenings, weekends, school breaks)
• Week-about (equal time) — child alternates weeks between homes
• Two-two-three schedules, four-three splits, or other rotating patterns
• Supervised parenting time, where visits occur in the presence of a third party (used in situations involving safety concerns)

There is no presumption in Ontario law that equal time is automatically best. The schedule that serves the child's best interests — based on their age, school schedule, relationships, and the parents' ability to cooperate — is the right one. Courts look at the whole picture, not a formula.

The Best Interests of the Child: The Only Test That Matters

Whether you are negotiating a parenting plan or asking a judge to decide, the best interests of the child is the sole test. Ontario law sets out a non-exhaustive list of factors that courts must consider, including:

• The child's physical, emotional, and psychological needs, and how each parent meets those needs
• The nature and history of the child's relationship with each parent and other significant people in their life
• Each parent's willingness to support the child's relationship with the other parent
• The child's views and preferences, given appropriate weight based on age and maturity
• Any history of family violence — courts must consider this carefully; exposure to domestic violence is treated as a factor affecting the child's wellbeing
• The ability of each person to communicate and cooperate on parenting matters
• Any existing orders or agreements

Courts are also required to consider plans that maximize the child's contact with both parents, provided doing so is safe and consistent with the child's best interests. This does not mean equal time in every case — it means courts take both parental relationships seriously.

Parenting Plans: How Arrangements Are Made

Most parenting arrangements are not decided by a judge. The majority of separating parents reach an agreement — either on their own, through mediation, or with the help of lawyers. That agreement is written into a parenting plan and can be filed with the court to become a formal order, or kept as a domestic contract.

A solid parenting plan typically covers:

• The regular parenting schedule (weekdays, weekends, school years)
• Holiday and school-break schedule (Christmas, March break, summer, statutory holidays, birthdays)
• How parents will communicate about the child (email, a parenting app, phone)
• How decision-making responsibility is allocated
• How the plan will be reviewed as the child grows
• Travel and passport rules
• What happens if a parent needs to relocate

The more detailed the plan, the less room for future conflict. Vague plans ("reasonable access") tend to generate disputes.

What If We Cannot Agree?

If parents cannot reach a parenting plan, options include:

1. Mediation — a neutral mediator helps both parents work toward an agreement. Many Ontario mediators specialize in family disputes.
2. Collaborative law — lawyers trained in collaborative practice help both sides negotiate without going to court.
3. Parenting coordination — once a plan is in place, a parenting coordinator can help resolve day-to-day disputes.
4. Court — either parent can apply for a parenting order. The court will consider all the best-interests factors and impose a plan.

Going to court is the most expensive and time-consuming path. It also puts the decision in a judge's hands rather than yours. Most families benefit from exploring negotiation and mediation before litigating.

Can a Parenting Order Be Changed Later?

Yes. Parenting orders are not permanent. Either parent can bring a motion to change a parenting order if there has been a material change in circumstances since the order was made — meaning a significant change that was not anticipated when the original order was made. Examples include a child's changing needs as they get older, a parent relocating, or a significant change in one parent's work schedule or living situation.

The bar for changing a parenting order is intentionally high to give children stability. Courts do not re-open arrangements simply because one parent is unhappy.

Frequently asked questions